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I can be ferocious if I want to.

I ran across a note in my file from August 2013. Although it was written over four years ago, there is an uncanny aspect to its application for today and may affect the design of our lives tomorrow. In light of today’s climate in almost any segment of American society—politics, entertainment, and religion to name three—there is a pervasive attitude pregnant with outsized self-importance. This shaded truth is explained as an alternate reality as though one phenomena can have more than one factually based truth. Claiming something to be true and factual when it is only my interpretation is claiming authority I don’t possess. Read the rest of this entry »

fullsizeoutput_575There are times when I still think Barbara, my wife of forty-five years, is in the room. I almost say something to her, but when I look around she’s not there. Then the loss and the pain of it washes over me anew. After many years of her presence, five years of her absence has not erased the emptiness that arrived expectantly but undesired on September 27, 2012 when she died after being ill for over two years. Michael Piazza, pastor of Middle Collegiate Church in New York City wrote in a recent post in reference to the loss of his husband, “My experience has been that the adage ‘time heals all wounds’ is probably a lie.”

Barbara and I began dating in the last year of graduate school, were engaged by graduation, and married a year later. Over the years, we lived in three U.S. states and four countries on two Read the rest of this entry »

kaleid.A kaleidoscope, the kind shaped like a hand-held telescope, contains pieces of material, each a different color. The viewer looks through the lens like looking through a telescope and sees a colorful pattern through two or more reflective surfaces. As the instrument is turned, the colorful patterns change. 

Consider each color in your kaleidoscope represents someone you’ve met. As you meet someone new, you add a new color. Then, consider each turn of the kaleidoscope a new day. Suddenly the pieces in your life align in such a way that a new pattern emerges. The new piece(s) added the day before now appear in the design next to pieces you may have had all your life. Read the rest of this entry »

Life ChallengesSomeone asked me recently what my blog was all about. I directed him to the “About” page on the blog and then gave him the short answer “How people shape their lives and how their lives are shaped by external influence.” Here is a longer answer: Read the rest of this entry »

In this concluding post to the series “Being Christian and Gay”, I want to do more than “put myself out there” in some kind of existential witness to faith and sexuality through my personal story, even though it’s through our stories, through the particularities of life, that the practicality of theological truths can most readily be observed. Read the rest of this entry »

Here is a reflection on the state of our peaceful, progressive city of Saint Louis after a

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Peaceful protesters tduring the second day of demonstrations.
Lawrence Bryant / Reuters a caption

month since a judge found Jason Stockley, a white former police officer, not guilty of first-degree murder in the death of Anthony Lamar Smith, a black man. Immediately after the verdict was announced (on Friday, September 14, 2017), people began to protest in the streets in anger against the decision. Read the rest of this entry »

group at round table

A representation of group at Kaldi’s.

A few days ago, I was sitting on Kaldi’s patio after my daily visit to the Arch. To my right was a group of four who apparently work out of the same office. It is an interesting ethnic mix: South Asian, East Asian, African-American, and Hispanic. This wouldn’t happen in many small towns across America. I enjoy the complexity and cultural diversity of urban living in downtown Saint Louis, Read the rest of this entry »

In this post, I’m moving beyond sexuality to talk about straddling a fence. Living Between Two Worlds authentically and with integrity is not easy. Attempting to live such a life for a gay person is compounded by a perceived oxymoron—a gay Christian—by both the Christian community and the gay community. Read the rest of this entry »

In this series on “Being Christian and Gay,” we have considered scripture and a Christian sexual ethic. In this post we’ll examine a general understanding of sexuality. There’s more, to being gay than the act of sexual intimacy. I, like you, both consciously and subconsciously are attracted to and seek to attract other people with whom to form deep relationships. This is the way we ward off loneliness. It is also the way we seek an intimate relationship. Read the rest of this entry »

We have considered a context for our conversation—personal experience–and biblical texts that have been used to address sexual orientation; now let’s look at ethics, knowing right from wrong. My ethics are derived from my theological understanding, which is informed by my relationship with Jesus, my reading of Scripture, and my interpretation of the contemporary sociocultural environment. Read the rest of this entry »